One of the questions I often get asked about online transgender dating is how to get to know and engage men via email or phone calls before meeting them in person to get them interested. Well, let’s say you “meet” a man online through trans dating sites and start writing to him every day. He is intelligent, charming, attractive and, on the whole, has many good qualities. You have a great time communicating with him, making sure your words and actions help him determine if he is the right person and, if he is right, get his attention.
If he suddenly stops writing letters or making phone calls, you will feel confused and disappointed, because in all your competitions, this person is the one you are most looking forward to meeting. It’s never been a fun feeling. How do you meet the right guy online and do it in a way that will keep him hooked from the first “hello” to the first date and beyond?
What is the purpose of online transgender dating
First, I want to make a distinction between what I consider to be online shemale dating. Online transgender dating is a great way to get introduced to men who share your interests and values and match them to your profile, with the goal of seeing if there’s enough spark to meet. Some emails, phone calls and text messages are a virtual “flirtation.” “There is no real relationship in this man’s mind. So if you’ve been chatting with a man online for a while (weeks or months) and he suddenly stops writing or takes longer to answer your letters, don’t take it too personally. The key here is not to overanalyze the cause. Trying to figure out why men do what they do, with no rules or reason, not only drives you crazy, it also inadvertently gives you a “feeling” that you can’t help yourself. You may be disappointed, but it’s best to move on. My tip is to make a phone call and then find someone to do a low-stress or fun “get to know each other” activity. This way can save your time, energy or money.
The dangers of instant connectivity
When you start chatting with a man online, when you “click” with him, it’s easy to get addicted to the feeling of emotional connection, you are both sharing intimate things about yourself with each other. For some trans women, talking to men online may be the only recent experience in which a transgender woman is comfortable dating someone their own age. Be careful here. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that your ability to share and connect will translate well when you’re face-to-face. His words and actions may differ from the way he writes. You may not feel as comfortable with him or have the same chemistry as you do online.